Archive for November 5th, 2006

The Rambler Returns

Grandad November 5th, 2006

I’m back.

Herself made a phonecall to George W this morning. Poor chap. I almost feel sorry for him.

Anyway, the long and the short of it is that they decided to let me go, provided I publish an apology to the people of America.

I have done this. I have placed a full page apology in the Mullingar Beekeepers Monthly which will be on sale in all good newsagents next week [in Mullingar, anyway].

They looked after me well. They only tortured me a little bit. They tried shouting at me, but I’m getting deaf these days, so that didn’t work. They tried beating be around a bit, but after nearly forty years of married life I’m immune to that. They tried attaching electrodes to my private parts and lamming 20,000 volts through me, but if you’ve ever had a vindaloo curry from our local takeaway, you’ll know the effect is much the same.

So they got bored with me. Then George W rang them in tears, and they flew me home.

I see the Sunday Times has decided to pinch my ideas now. They have a two page spread expanding on my yesterdays thoughts. I’m flattered.

[Note to the CIA: you can remove that van from outside my house now. The one with the tinted windows. Somehow I think the "Washington Power and Utilities" logo on the side is a bit of a giveaway anyway, here in rural Ireland]

My blog has won me a holiday

Grandad November 5th, 2006

Well! I had some interesting reactions to the thing I published yesterday. I didn’t think many people read this, but apparently they do.

I have discovered a couple of things as a result…

One is that the CIA are lying. Take note Bertie! They are transporting political prisoners through Shannon on their so called ‘rendition’ flights.

Another is that it is very hot in the Caribbean at this time of year. [Note to Americans - the emphasis is on the "e" not the "i"].

I also got to meet the bloke who commented on yesterdays post. Nice chap. We are sharing a cell room.

For my loyal readers, please note that I have a new e-mail address -

headrambles@guantanamo.bay.mil

I’m attaching a photo of me on my holiday. It’s not a very good one. I think the photographer was on heroin at the time.

Holiday arrival