A few things you don't want to know about me
Grandad February 9th, 2007
I have notice that other people have written strange useless lists in the past.
“10 things you never knew about me” type of thing.
Aw, what the heck……..
I have never lived in a house with an even number. And I have lived in five different houses.
I have no nail on my right big toe. They removed it when I was 15, but left a bit of root in so now I have a rhinoceros horn instead.
I can dowse. You know – that thingy with hazel sticks, to find underground water. It comes in handy sometimes.
Apart from a diary, I have never written anything before I started this blog [apart from letters, e-mails, essays in school, shopping lists and the like].
Of all the companies I have worked for [5] only the last one still exists. Which is just as well as they pay my pension. I managed to bankrupt the rest.
I suffer from tinnitus which means I spend my time shouting “Wha?” at Herself.
I was never in an aircraft until I was 40. Then I flew for an hour and had full control of the plane for 50 minutes.
I am a mistake. My mother told me that when I was young. She never wanted more children. My mother was well known for her tact, diplomacy and willingness to instil confidence in her offspring.
I’m not a bad cook [though I say so myself], and can turn out a mean roast/stew/pie/fry/bolognaise/curry or whatever. I haven’t poisoned anyone yet.
My family tree includes a president, a famous philosopher, a famous actor and a pirate.
I am not a true Irishman, because I have never been barred from a pub. Though I’ve been thrown out of quite a few in my time.
I once played rugby for my school, even though I was as blind as a bat without my glasses, and hated the game [and never scored a try]. I also once played hockey for my company even though no-one ever told me the rules [we won, but that was mainly due to the injuries I inflicted on the other team].
The only sport I have ever been interested in is caving/potholing/spelunking or whatever you want to call it. I’m too old for it now.
I once had to be rescued by the British Army after being trapped overnight by a disastrous flood that wiped out a village.
I am grouchy, have little or no sense of humour and am very difficult to live with.
There. That’s fifteen useless things about me even I didn’t know until now.
If you want to know any more about me – tough. That’s your lot.
- Around the house , Rambles
- Comments(13)
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Apart from a diary, I have never written anything before I started this blog [apart from letters, e-mails, essays in school, shopping lists and the like].
That’s my kind of humour. Tell me, is there a knack to dowsing? How does one divine the presence of water?
I don’t know what this dowsing thing is. I just hold the twig and the damn thing twitches like mad when I pass over underground water. I don’t believe in it, but it works!
I once had to be rescued by the British Army after being trapped overnight by a disastrous flood that wiped out a village.
Was that Boscastle?
How do you get those little flags beside the commenters name?
Was that Boscastle?
Nah. Cheddar. I think it was 1968.
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As far as I know, the flags are an option with WordPress – FireStats plugin.
I had to dowse in one job i had.I was doddlebugging, but i used pin flags.Instead of locating water i was locating my shot holes, so i could hook up to my charges between 5 & 20 pounds of plastic explosive.We were looking for oil.and the reason we dowse everything was hidden by mud from drilling 100 feet down,I quit after a 20 pound charge floated blew a hole you could put a truck in it.
Ah Grandad, my father told me one Christmas day over the turkey that I was a mistake too. I don’t think it has had any lasting impact – other than the inability to hold down a job or a man.
i’m reading and reading and thinking, man, i had no idea ten was such a big number.
and then of course it was 15.
@Popeye – you sound like an exciting sort of person to have around? Never a dull moment!!
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@Laurie – I’m sorry about that. It was only when I started writing that I discovered how boring I was, and had to keep going.
@Flirty – I don’t know what it is about your comments, but they all get marked down as spam! Are you in the habit of normally spamming? I nearly deleted you, which you would have found very painful.
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Frankly, the unwanted bit never bothered me. I mean to say – I’m here, so why worry! And anyway it was great for morally blackmailing my mother in later years -
“Hey – remember that time you scarred me for life by telling me I was unwanted? Well, my psychiatrist tells me I might get someway towards forgiveness if you……”
You get the idea
I too played rugby, with Cavan Rugby Club for two and a half years. In those two and a half years, I was used as a last minute substitute to run down time, or to hassle the opposition’s flowing game with stupid high tackles.
I never scored a try either. I once agreed to pay somebody 50 euro if we were playing a hopeless team to pass me the ball if they were over the try line, but that didn’t work either.
Glory-seeking bastards.
It explains a lot.
Your childhood trauma has led to you traumatising the blogosphere in your Golden Years
Grandad,
Remember what Rodney Dangerfield said about his parents not wanting him?
He said he got his first clue when his bath toys were a radio and a toaster.
They couldn’t hold that good man down either. He ended up very successful .
Now, I LOVE your dog,Sandy. Thanks for the link. It was fun to read about
her and the picture of her reading the book was neat. I know you said she was smart, but isn’t
Ulysses a bit beyond her?
@Dario – I must admit that rugby was the only thing I ever skipped off school for. Our coach judged players at the end of the game by how muck mud they had on them, so I just rolled in the mud at the start. It all seemed a bit pointless.
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@Michele – revenge is sweet
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@Nancy – Yes, Sandy is the real love of my life [don't tell herself]. As for Ulysses – you must be joking! She did a thesis on Ulysses for her doctorate. She’s into Plato at the moment [in the original Greek].