Archive for May 9th, 2007

Some Science

Grandad May 9th, 2007

I have categorised this as Spam, because I didn’t ask for the e-mail it came in.

However, it came from a friend, and I like it.

It is very educational, so I thought I would share it with you.

-oOo-

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas would have been produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that’s more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)

A pig’s orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Creepy.)
(I’m still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don’t try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate whilst its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male’s head off.
(Honey, I’m home. What the…?!)

A flea can jump 350 times its body length. It’s like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes - lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life…quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm……)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you’re ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat’s urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
( I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they’ll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Hey what about that pig??)

pig.jpg

Salary cuts

Grandad May 9th, 2007

So the HSE wants to deduct 13% from the nurses salaries for failing to produce the goods.

That sounds like a damn good idea.

Provided of course that all the outgoing government members pay back 25% of their salaries, allowances and pensions for their failure to produce on their promises.

And the HSE takes a deduction of 50% for failing to produce an adequate health service.