The most insane story of the week?
Grandad July 24th, 2007
I was browsing the Sunday Times and came across a little snippet.
I’m sure they wont mind me stealing robbing borrowing it ……
Council officials have warned a woman that birds in her garden are singing too loudly. Environmental health officers told Dorothy Berry, 65, that the blackbirds in her trees were upsetting neighbours in Fulham, west London.
“I have a lovely garden in which the blackbirds sing in the trees. But I really don’t see what we can do about that.”
What?
These morons are complaining about blackbirds?
This is so stupid, it just has to be true.
I don’t know which is worse – the neighbours, for complaining, or the council for listening to them.
I’d ram the neighbours’ iPods up their backsides and play Status Quo at them at full volume for a week.
They might appreciate the beauty of a blackbird then.
- Rants
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Incredible.
Blackbirds I don’t mind but Starlings. There are at least 30 of them in our back garden and neighbours. They make some racket every morning and evening but calling the authorities to complain about it never entered my head.
I would feel pretty stupid ringing up the local garda station to complain about birds in the garden. That’s what makes it even more ridiculous when someone does complain to the authorities and they actually try to do something about it.
Grandad the BBC sent someone along to hear and record the birdsong. Guess what? There were no birds about and not a note to be heard.
I dislike the Starlings. My neighbour had them under the roof tiles a few years back, a very messy experience. It was only then I discovered that they produced young three times in any one year.
Starlings can be mildly irritating at times, but blackbirds and thrushes? I love the song of a blackbird.
Did the council ask her to turn their volume down? Was she supposed to shoot them? Remove her trees? Go running around the garden in her underwear to frighten them off?
What did the neighbours prefer? Burglar alarms? Police sirens?
The mind boggles…..
Grannymar – Blackbirds are very intelligent. They weren’t going to sing unless they had a contract, with repeat fees.
AND AN AGENT!!!!
I’d ram the neighbours’ iPods up their backsides and play Status Quo at them at full volume for a week.
And that’d be good for your colon …
I thought singing in the dead of night was what blackbirds did.
Perhaps someone should send the council a Beatles CD
http://www.seeklyrics.com/lyrics/Beatles/Blackbird.html
We used to have a thrush that sang all night – there was a street light that confused him…
Maybe if the blackbirds just turned down the volume a bit, it would be more acceptable. It is, after all is said and done, very inconsiderate of the birds to sit in trees in what is mankinds domain.
Grandad,
Maybe the Blackbird’s agent could book the “Birds” into that big old tree in your garden and they could sing “Tie a yellow ribbon round the old folks tree,And in 3 long years will they still want me?”
Say, Now that I think of it, when is that Song Contest, anyway? I think the “Birds” just might win!
If they were in Grandad’s garden they could be the Yardbirds.
Maybe if the blackbirds just turned down the volume a bit, it would be more acceptable.
You’ll have to talk to their union about that.
Ian,
Level with me here. Do you think the “Yardbirds” really have a shot at winning the European Song Contest?
I’ve got a shotgun she can borrow
Oh yeah and I’ve change my nationality by deed poll.
In my book they would win any song contest. They can call themselves the Byrds.
B3n – You’re a callous b*st*rd. Unless it’s to dispatch the neighbours?
That’s exactly what I meant Grandad, I’m a vegetarian, I don’t believe in hurting any living thing, except wasps.
… and tourists. You’re like myself B3n.
I like your Estonian flag. Tried phoning a local call centre? – I bet they are all Irish working there!!