Archive for August 9th, 2007

You were warned

Grandad August 9th, 2007

I warned you last month.

But would you listen? No.

I pleaded for help. None came.

It’s Iraq all over again.

I have been invaded by the Americans. And not one of you b*st*rds in Ireland, the U.K. or the rest of Europe did a damn thing about it. I really know how Saddam felt.

Since the beginning of the month, 33.5% of my readers are American. Ireland comes second at a miserable 27.7% [traitors!]. And as for the U.K. - a pathetic 17%.

So I am now officially an American blog.

I have even been adopted by an American. I now have a 92 year old father living in Kansas. A father, I might add, that I’ve never met.

So you guys in Europe should be ashamed of yourselves. I’m even beginning to not know where Europe is. That’s how badly I’ve been Americanized.

I will hold on to my old values as long as I can. I will still spell color and theater the correct way. I will refuse to go to my local baseball or softball.

Please help. I’m being sucked under.

quicksand.jpeg

And I don’t even have any WMD.

I hate Tags. I hate Memes.

Grandad August 9th, 2007

When I was a kid we used to play chasing, or tag.

When I got bored with the game, I used to hit the tagger with a rock. End of game.

But you can’t do that on the Interweb. If someone tags you there is nothing you can do except ignore them. And that’s a bit rude. And I don’t think Diane has been here since the beginning so I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt.

I have been tagged / memed a few times before so THIS IS THE LAST TIME.

I have run out of things to say about myself, but I’ll try.

I’m over 1000 years old but I’m not yet 40.

Most of me didn’t exist fifteen years ago.

I am who I say I am, but yet I’m not.

I received a written invitation to join Mensa, but I didn’t see the point.

I know all my bank account numbers, credit card number and library account numbers but I can’t remember my friends’ names.

I have only been on a bus twice since 1971.

I recognise people not by their faces, but by how they walk.

I have a lower than average body temperature.

Now. Make what you wish of the above. That’s your lot.

I won’t pass this on, because I already have in the past.

One last one I nearly forgot -

I don’t have a sense of humour