It never rains but it pours
Grandad August 14th, 2007
I am not a happy bunny.
It started last night. I was in the kitchen. Herself was in the bathroom.
“It’s raining again” says Herself.
I looked out the window. “No it’s not” says I.
“Oh Sweet Mother of Divine Jeezus! Oh F*ck! Help!!” says Herself from the bathroom.
I went in to see what the fuss was about.
She was right. It was raining. Inside the bathroom, but not outside.
We have a hot press in there, which is a very large storage area for our clothes. Loads of shelves packed with sheets and towels and items of clothing. It also contains the immersion heater and the central heating plumbing which makes one area of it look like an oil refinery – loads of pipes and dials and valves and wiring. And water was pouring down onto all of this from above.
Herself screamed about all the clothing getting wet. I was slightly more concerned about the water pouring over the electrical panels.
Immediately above the hot press, on the flat roof is the main water tank.
“Sh*t,” thinks I “the f*cking tank has sprung a leak”. My language goes to pot when I’m stressed.
So I flushed the toilet and turned on all the taps to drain the tank. [Good tip there - flushing a toilet is a great way of draining a tank!]. Then I went outside and shinned onto the roof.
So there I was at about three o’clock this morning, up on the roof, in the pitch dark. It had started to rain at this stage, so I was wet as well. The tank was fine. So was all the plumbing. But the weatherproof casing that surrounds the tank was full of water. and the only thing I could do was bail this out by hand.
I would say I got about 20 gallons out, in all. It stopped the waterfall in the bathroom. So I tidied up and went to bed.
I didn’t sleep much, because I was waiting for the roof tank to fall into the bathroom. And I had to get up at eight to let in the flooring Lad.
So now I’m banished to the box-room because the floor is still going down. I’m tired. I’m aching all over. My hands are full of scrapes and splinters. I’m cold because all the doors and windows are open, because of the sawdust. Sandy is terrified because the Lad is using a nail gun and the bangs frighten her.
I still don’t know where that water came from.
I blame Global Warming.
- Around the house
- Comments(21)
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Dear unhappy Bunny – I think incontinence pads might be required here – to deal with all the little sh*ts and leaks in your life right now! Whatever happens, don’t let that nice new floor get damp!
Jesus, not on the new floor! Hey if the floor guy is still there, get him to make an ARK instead of putting down a floor.
Steph – I wouldn’t mind if it were a drop of incontinence. I’m used to that. But I wasn’t on the roof beforehand, and 20 gallons is a bit much, even for me.
The new floor has a special anti-uric acid layer on so that should be OK.
B3n – Good idea. There are enough off-cuts around [not to mention the old crap floor]. I’ll ask him to make up an ark and we’ll all sail off into the sunset on a sea of p*ss and rain.
Well there is one thing sure, your life is never boring.
Do you have any water wings?
Grannymar – Just at this moment, I crave a boring life. I have to be up at eight again tomorrow to let Flooring Lad in again [he finishes tomorrow] and the builder is coming at ten. That means an expedition onto the roof – and storms are forecast!
“I blame Global Warming”
I thought you blamed everything on George W. Bush!
You’re saying he’s not responsible for your leaky roof! Amazing!!
You won’t catch me out that easily….
George W is responsible for Global Warming!
It could be a side effect of the pills!
20 gallons??
There is no pill on earth can do that.
Just think – it would take at least 160 pints of Guinness.
Mmmmmmmmm
Floors again, Grandad? I thought the Irish lived in thatched cottages with dirt floors? Putting on airs, are you?
We’re going up in the world, Diane. Literally.
Ah, poor Grandad. May the God’s, Goddesses, and good karma be with you, sir.
And, steer clear of those pills!
Ahhhh! At last. Someone in this miserable world who cares. Thank you Jefferson. You are the last of the world’s gentlemen.
Now; at last… I can go for a nap.
luckily it’s nice and sunny today so you shouldn’t have any more problems :-~)
Hey! Perhaps it’s a diabolical water-related plot against senior citizens! An Internet friend of mine who lives in the state of Georgia (USA, not the Russian Georgia) told me about a bursting water heater in her farmhouse the same night. A conspiracy?
So much for weatherproof casing!
Hahaha. I know it’s not funny but it is! Sorry ’bout the scratched fingers, at least you can skyp/type. I take heart when someone else has a domestic disaster makes me feel so much less alone! Maybe it’s condensation from your washing that’s accumulating on the roof. Tell Granny to spin dry before she hangs the clothes up! (actually they’re using the condensation and recycling technique in the Chinese Swim Centre for the Olympics. Lots of sweaty spectators and pool condensation gets recycled and sloshed right back in the pool . . ugh!
This might cheer you up.
I know who’s to blame….
Not George W, not global warming, no.
You will have to get on to the Department of Transport because Noel Dempsey is to blame for this particular occurrence.
He nearly did the same to me last week:
http://daveforsythe.blogspot.com/2007/08/i-found-noel-dempsey-in-hotpress.html
Noel will probably blame the downturn in the US economy though. so that will bring it all back to Dubya again
Flirty – What part of Ireland are you dreaming from? Nice and sunny?????
Marlys – You could be onto something there. IT’S A CONSPIRACY!! Drown the Duffers Week?
Robert – F*ck off! It was weatherproof when I built it 40 years ago, and I build to last!
Dave – There is a definite pattern emerging here. So Noel Dempsey, at the behest of George W [or Dubya] is invading the hot presses of elder citizens. It obviously has something to do with global warming. Or rendition flights. Or international stock exchange rates.
Dankoozy – See above