Are you a Bum Puffer?
Grandad October 4th, 2007
A couple of weeks ago, I got chatting to a bloke.
He asked me if I was a Bum Puffer.
To cut a long story short, he’s making good progress.
He can now feed through a tube through what’s left of his jaw. They managed to remove his right leg from his rectum and sew it back on. And they are hopeful that they will find his arms somewhere.
But this got me thinking. What exactly is a Bum Puffer?
I did a search on the Interweb and came up with nothing. I even tried the Urban Slang sites. I tried Gay sites. Not a mention. I tried sites about flatulence. Rien. Nada.
Then a nice chap contacted me from Australia. He explained. Thanks Rohan.
Apparently Bum Puffing is the act of smoking without inhaling. That’s all. Trust the Australians to make something simple sound crude.
So I am a Bum Puffer. I’m Bum Puffing as I write.
I feel bad now. I suppose I had better visit that bloke and apologise.
I’ll bring him some grapes.
I’ll liquidise them first.
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Maybe you better leave it for a few days. He might still be traumatised.
On second thoughts you better get to him soon in case he teams up with Ron and the start to scheme against you!
Ron is still in Thailand [I think]. But you’re right – I’d better apologise. Even though it goes against my nature.
Sounds like he was a proper Dick!
No, Grannymar. That was shoved down his throat.
Would you like to hear some more funny?
I’m Australian. I’ve only ever heard it referred to as ‘bum-sucking.’
A whole new set of imagery.
And yet the connotations had never occurred to me before now…
I meant to say SOMETHING more funny.
Oops.
Bum Sucking is worse. It conjours up an image of an elephant sitting in a water hole, for some reason.
I immediately presumed it meant the same as you so actions are slightly justified.
Thank you, TomTom. I shall, of course, be calling you as a witness if there is a court case.
The mind boggles to think what would happen if you smoked in the bath, Grandad!
Just to educate your readers a little more, I’m also a Nose Puffer, meaning you swallow the smoke a little and push/exhale it out your nose. The purpose of this procedure? It increases the flavor/taste for the discerning pipe smoker. However you do not take it into your lungs. That would mean you’d die of lung cancer instead of throat and mouth cancer.
Puffer in the Dam…no jokes please!
Hold on! If Nose Puffer means blowing out your nose, the Bum Puffer does mean blowing out………
I was right all along
“Puffer in the Dam…no jokes please!”
Ah! Pleeeeeease?
All this puffing has me panting!
I’m away out for a walk in the sunshine.
Have a cigarette while you’re out there.
I heard bum the term bum puffing before, bf being smoker and all. Bum sucker on the other hand, never heard that one. The first thing that came to my head was “hoover”… stranger things have happened.
Grandad,
Overheard from the next booth……..
“I’m not kidding, the sex was so good ever the neighbors had a cigarette afterwards……
I am most definitely not a bam puffer.
I inhale
And hold it
And then I get really hungry.
Shit, someone’s gotta play with these kids.
Bum Puffer…Peter Puffer…Nose Puffer, I would have made sure he didn’t breathe right for quite awhile. Good job, Grandad!
Youre far too unimaginative. They’re simply trying to shelter yuor tender innocence . I have it on the very best authority that bum puffing was an art widely practices among sailors of coarse repute.
Yes You’re getting the picture ; The cigarette was placed in the place where the sun dont shine and the smoke was inhaled as it were in reverse.. which led to an entire new lexicon the remnants of which survive to this day .. some of the less prosaic being faggot a derivation from the abreviation for the weed and the latin otterinum -the last extreme of the digestive tract
so bill was the first presidential bum puffer .. Hmmmm
and all this time I thought a bum puffer was someone who cadged other peoples fags (not meant in any gay way) rahter than buy there own…I shall have to apoligize to Uncle Alf after calling him that for years..he must be a smoke mooch instead…..
Sue – I think that sounds like a technique that is used with the more ‘exotic’ tobaccos?
RB – A cigarette cadger used to be known as a Fag Bummer. Unfortunately, that term can’t be used any more for obvious reasons.