Surreality
Grandad October 22nd, 2007
I’m in bad mood today. What else is new?
I wrote my little anniversary post this morning, and ended it politely like Me Mammy always taught me to.
I then had to go out to the village.
First thing was that I found my gate blocked by a f*cking SUV! As I am surrounded by damned building sites at the moment, I picked a builder at random and nailed him to a gatepost. He eventually told me who owned the SUV, just before he passed out.
The SUV was moved [and that is going to be a pile of ashes by tonight] so I went to the village. I found a nice parking spot but another f*cking SUV swung into it just ahead of me. Is it any wonder I hate the things?
In the shop, I saw a notice pinned to the wall. To cheer myself up, I read it, as it was from the local Senior Citizens’ Club.
Dear Friends,
It’s that time of year again when we have our last get-together.
With supper, music and dancing.
What the hell is this about? Senior Citizen Culling? A Lemming Syndrome? I didn’t realise they held an annual mass-suicide.
I won’t be going. I have no intention of popping my clogs just yet.
On my way home I got stuck behind a tourist bus. In October! Do they not know any better? Do they not read by blog?? Luckily, I had my RPG with me [Sandy was sitting on it, so it was nice and warm]. That made me feel a lot happier.
Then I get home and find my blog is filling up with comments.
What’s wrong with you all? Did no-one ever to say good bye when you are finishing a conversation? Should I have said ’see ya’, or ‘talk to you tomorrow’ or whatever the modern idiom is?
I liked the comment from Rhodester -
You best not quit blogging now.. if you do, I shall bring the missus and visit Ireland. We’ll hang out in your local pub and beat everyone at darts while regaling you with tales of life in California. We’ll be loud, brash and rude, and we’ll wear Hawaiian shirts and take pictures of EVERYTHING, so we can post them to our blogs upon returning home. Our friends will read about it and see the pictures, then they’ll want to come, and come they shall.. in droves..
Reminds me of the 60’s!!
And it just goes to show [to quote the Irish Rail ad] “A lot done, a lot more to do”.
The madness and the mayhem will continue. If only to keep Rhodester out.
I have to go now.
I have a few more builders to cull.
- Around the village , Rambles , Tourists
- Comments(21)
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Oh thank F***
ye had me seriously worried there for a minute GD.
Happy Blog birthday day or whatever the correct term is
See I told you….
Couldn’t live without us.
Thanks George
Blogiversary? [As if we didn't have enough stupid new words flying around..]
Grannymar - You couldn’t live without me. You are, after all, just a figment of my imagination.
agreed on the stupid new words
BTW if Grannymar is a pigment of your coloured imagination, then what does it say about me, married to her daughter?
Should I/We be in therapy together? lol :p
How do I know you/Elly exist? I don’t. I know Michele exists because I met him [but again, that could have been a nightmare?].
If you like, I can imagine a therapist, and you can make an appointment with him or her?
Ah nuts, do I exist? am I real or even virtual? argh now my head hurts, ergo I must be something but what???
Right that’s it I’m off to take the Turin test, at least that should prove that I’m not a machine, well, unless I fail.
You’ve just said it yourself. You’re a headache!
Well for (insert deity of choice)’s sake don’t take any headache pills!
Cheer up Grandad - it’s your Blog’Day! Time for a well-earned pint (or three)!
I can’t believe you’ve only been blogging for one year - that’s amazing! Yet another reason to win a BEST BLOGGER AWARD! Fingers x’d for you.
Thanks, Steph. Why didn’t I think of that?
I can’t believe it’s only a year. Seems like a bloody lifetime…
Thanks for the X’d fingers. I can’t afford to go to the thing though. They’re trying to fleece me.
Unless of course, a company would like to sponsor me? Now there’s and idea!
George!
GEORGE!!!!!
Damnit - just remembered - he’s only a fig-leaf of my immagination..
Grandad - you’ve got it all wrong!
Don’t those people realise that you’re already famous?
What you need is an agent - someone to tell those buggers you charge a hefty appearance fee.
Grannymar could carry that off brilliantly!
Good luck
Grannymar - over to you. Steph says so.
SUV….jeez they have those friggin’ things over there too? Say it ain’t so! next time, I would recommend quietly saying “supersize this you liver fluke!” as you stuff a particularly well-endowed Irish spud in the tail pipe.
You have my complete support. Everyone around here seems caught in a vicious circle.Taking out jumbo loans to buy cavernous houses to park jumbo SUVs to haul oversized A$$e$ and “supersized” burgers down the 8 lane freeway. I sincerely hope you all are not all going on the “jabba-the-hut” diet of the USA.
Oh, enjoy that Blog-day!
Thanks Grandad..with you putting up barriers preventing the Hawaiianshirt brigade into Ireland..there all coming to Canada to see Niagara Falls and to Whistler Mountain to go skiing..all we got for defence is a sub the Brits sold us which sunk and a couple of old Sea King helicopters with Blunderbusses….were going to be swamped…
OregonDan - The Irish seem to be intent on buying the entire world’s supply of SUVs. We also have the highest number of private helicopters per capita in the world. This country is going down the pan rapidly.
Robert - Do you want the name of a great arms supplier?
I was QUOTED on your blog? I’m gobsmacked. I don’t even know you and here we are, gone a courtin’..
I’ve been close to Ireland, but not actually IN Ireland, so you needn’t worry. I stopped at Scotland and just peered over the water at you. This was a few years ago, and I don’t think you saw me.
You should visit California though.. I’ll take you to Disneyland and we can have mint juleps in New Orleans Square.
Rhodester - If you don’t know me, why are you commenting? And we’re not courtin’. I’m
happilymarried.Funny you should mention Scotland. I was up in Norn Iron around then, looking at Scotland. Was that you with the lurex track-suit and all the cameras?
I thought Disney World was in Florida? Or Paris? Are you breeding them over there?
There’s a Disney thing here in California, I think it was the first one. It’s relatively small compared to the one in Florida, which is about the same size as Ireland. I hear they want to put one in Dublin, will you be going if they do? They hire seniors too, maybe that’s something to look into if you cease all this blogging nonsense. You’d fit right in on the “Pirates of the Caribbean” ride.
First I have heard of it. The only Disney World we have here is the government.
And don’t worry - if they do decide to build one, I shall be leading the sabotage efforts. That should be fun!
I’m here per Rhodester’s boost. Ya, I’m a follower, but don’t tell those closest to me, they think I’m the biggest B**** alive and don’t listen to nobody.
[...] I suppose I should go ahead and mention Grandad on my blog, since he went and mentioned me. [...]