Archive for December 2nd, 2007

Christmas has been cancelled

Grandad December 2nd, 2007

Now that December is here, I can talk about Christmas.

The big news is that it has been moved.

December the 25th is no longer Christmas Day.

Starting from this year [so that we can conveniently ignore the upcoming one] Christmas Day now falls on September 11th.

Why?

For a start, December 25th has nothing whatsoever to do with the birth of Christ. Analysis of the bible and of astronomy [not astrology] shows that the most accurate estimate of the birth of Christ is between September 3rd and September 11th. The only reason it is celebrated in December is that the early Christians were jealous of the success of the Roman feast of Saturnalia, and the Pagan feast of Midwinter. So they decided to plonk Christmas in there, just to hi-jack it.

In fact, there is almost nothing Christian about Christmas. Christmas tree? Pagan. Holly and ivy? Pagan. Santa Claus? Coca Cola! You name it, it is probably Pagan in origin.

So let’s call Christmas for what it really is - a brash orgy of consumerism to celebrate mid-winter. I have no problem with that. I love December 21st because it means the days are going to get longer, and spring is on it’s way.

Why pick September 11th?

Why not? It is a hell of a lot more accurate than December, and it will have the added bonus of distracting the Americans from whinging about the World Trade Centre. [Get over it, lads - it was six years ago and other countries have suffered far worse atrocities].

I say it is a damn good idea.

What say you?

xmas-fuckit