Facebook is a pain in the face
Grandad January 28th, 2008
I have made some mistakes in my time.
One of the biggest was getting involved in so called Social Networking sites. And the worst of these is Facebook.
It seemed like a good idea at the time. I could join, and then see what my virtual friends are up to. But it didn’t work out that way.
I am being inundated with requests, and some of them are frankly weird. I have requests for hugs, attacks and sexual personality tests. I have been attacked by zombies and asked to predict my life. I swear I even had a ‘make a baby’ request at some stage.
The problem is that each of these requests requires me to install another application. And when I install it, I am supposed to inflict all my contacts with the same requests. It’s like pyramid selling on steroids. And some of the applications want my mobile phone number. Why? They’re not getting it. They can fuck off.
I have reached the stage now where a mail from Facebook arrives in my Inbox telling me that someone wants to whisk me off to the Bahamas for an orgy, and I sigh and delete it.
I still drop in every couple of weeks to see if there is anything interesting going on. There isn’t. Just the same old crowd partying like mad like they were on cocaine.
I would delete my account, but my personal information is up there to be gathered. Of course it’s all wrong, so I’m hoping I’ll screw up their system.
So if anyone wants to have my babies, you’ll have to call around to my house, in person. We’ll do things the old fashioned way.
You won’t find me on Facebook.
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Facebookers are ‘partying like mad like they were on cocaine.’
Just like here then!
I’ll be back when the smoke clears!
“Send Grandad a Fish”…
Oh, Cod, the apps are getting sillier.
Grannymar - At least the people here are sane.
??
Robert - One of the reasons I got sick of it. Do I want to be bitten by a zombie?
Does a zombie have teeth?
It took ya’ long enough! Check out my post from last November.
http://www.brianf.us/2007/11/04/faecebook/
I googled the word faecebook and my post came up number four.
No wonder it’s the number two search term on my site.
Brianf - In fact I stopped around the same time as yourself! I remember that post. I haven’t removed myself altogether, as I like to annoy and confuse people.
I was going to do a ‘faecebook’ pun, so you can thank me that I didn’t. You would have been knocked to #5!!
I got tired of facebook pretty quickly too. All those bloody requests. Like yourself I only log in every now and then to see if anything has changed.
Grandad - is there a queue forming outside your house?
That was some offer you made this morning
Grandad - is there a queue forming outside your house?
That was some offer you made this morning!
Steph - By posting the same comment twice, you aren’t getting any special treatment.
GET BACK TO THE END OF THE QUEUE!!!
Hilarious
I’m weak from laughing!
Surely Grandad it is just your natural popularity, charm, and unique skills that cause this rush of love for you…. front of the queue for me?
OK, Laura. Just tell my receptionist that I said you could.
Grandad,
How does one actually leave Facebook? I disabled my account after a week because it all seemed daft, then was browbeaten by a colleague into reactivating it before calling it a day completely after a fortnight of rubbish. I think the last straw was a student in Colombia requesting to join my friends’ list because he was also a Catholic who liked U2. Falling into neither category, I decided it was pointless, but can find no way to delete the account. I am tempted to reactivate it and put myself as a U2 fan called Benedict living in Italy to see how many Colombians I net.
I have no idea, Ian. It is possible to remove yourself, because a few people have done it. Your details remain though [or so I believe], and this is one of the main rages against Facebook. Once you’re in, you’re in for life. If you can find out where their servers are, I could launch an ICBM if you like?
“So if anyone wants to have my babies, you’ll have to call around to my house, in person. We’ll do things the old fashioned way.”
Grandad! Is that a proposition?? *blushes*
PS: No idea what you’re talking about. Can’t load Facebook out here in dial-up land!
OOps, sorry, just realised Steph already cracked my joke. I’ll get my coat…
E Mum - Is there any chance you could wait until tomorrow? There is a queue of a couple of hundred here at the moment, and I’m getting a little tired.
I advise you stick with it. Consider it another source of material for future posts. You can call it the “Facebook Follies” or Facebook Fracas” or something equally ridiculous. “Weekly Worthless Facebook Application” comes to mind.
Besides…I’m sure they’d miss you.
You have to delete all information, links and applications individually if you want to leave altogether then a little “?” appears where you would have been so you never really delete everything. Now don’t be such a bah humbug or I’ll have to throw a haggis at you!
“Is there any chance you could wait until tomorrow? There is a queue of a couple of hundred here at the moment, and I’m getting a little tired.”
This image is too much for me
I’ve haven’t laughed so much in ages!
Thanks! Grandad
From what I can gather the simplest way to leave facebook is to get banned .. You then kill two birds with one stone:
- you get rid of your facebook account
- you get to whine about them banning you and get loads of other bloggers supporting you
It’s a win win situation
Michele (who would never suggest such behaviour)
*Pokes*
And all the booze people send you apparently isn’t real either.
agree entirely it’s complete pain in the arse, I stopped all the e-mails, they where wrecking my head and some required explanations if my wife happened upon them ……….Sexy sue wants to poke you???????????
Facebook! what a mess…
hmmm I can’t have a baby with you either GranDad it would be like snogging my dad… ewwwwwwwwwwww
Heh. There goes my tea all over the keyboard again.
I can see future blog posts on this subject. In fact, that’s why I invited you all to have my babies.
The response is poor though. Down to a mere trickle today…..
I’m not surprised you couldn’t sleep last night, Grandad
The mere trickle and poor response mean you’re dehydrated after that hard day’s work
It’s OK Steph. I’m full of very strong coffee and diesel fumes from my trip the the village today. I’m re-hydrated and full of vigour.
* NEXT PLEASE?*
Can neutered bitches apply?
Steph - No harm in practice/pretend?