The Accidental Terrorist restores order
Grandad February 28th, 2008
I wrote last week that there was to be a meeting about my trees eating lorries.
The meeting was held.
My God, it was horrible!
I decided to bring TAT along as my weapon of choice. I asked our K8 not to feed him for a day or two beforehand, and not to give him his pills that day.
Unfortunately, she got overenthusiastic, and withheld all his medication for 24 hours, including the injections.
I didn’t know this, and when the meeting started, I let TAT loose.
Even I was horrified at the carnage. They had to call three ambulances. Two of my neighbours now think they are Napoleon and are emigrating to St Elba. Three more are in a state of catatonic shock and doctors don’t hold out much hope of recovery. I was OK because TAT knows my smell [pipe tobacco, and old socks], but for the first time in quite a while, I was scared.
I eventually managed to get TAT caged again. The meeting was cancelled because the chairman was crying in the toilets and wouldn’t come out.
I think my trees are safe.
Thanks, TAT.
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Vous temps est arivée Wellington!
is TAT the cat?
Is TAT back on his meds?
All that from just farting? I’m glad K8 didn’t feed him any Guinness.
Neighbour - How’s Elba? I found your arm, by the way.
Roy - TAT is my daughter’s partner and father of my grandchildren.
Tanya - Back on full medication and completely sedated. He’s very happy.
Brianf - Farting is what he does when he’s on his medication. When he’s off his medication, he reminds me of Animal from the Muppet Show.
Please say that one of the ‘affected’ neighbours was Mr Digger! Did you bring your shotgun? Oh, please say that you did and TAT did not get all the fun . . . .
By the way, you’ve been tagged.
Shane - Which Mr Digger? Since the meeting, his personality has split into so many that we don’t know which one is which. He spends his time now arguing with himself.
And I never bring a loaded shotgun anywhere near an unloadad TAT. But don’t worry about my not having any fun…..
Brianf - Bollox.
Grandad, It’s a new angle at forest preservation, but I have to say I like it. Save the Trees!
Quickroute - I love my trees. If sacrifices have to me made, and foul deeds done, then so be it.