A hair of the Grandad
Grandad May 9th, 2008
I went for my annual haircut the other day.
Apart from being a good cutter, I like the bloke there because he doesn’t have a holiday fixation. I can never understand that weird aspect of haircutting. You can get chatting to anyone anywhere, and they will talk about the weather, or politics or [God help us] sport, but they never mention holidays. With hairdressers, it’s always the first question - “Got any holidays planned for this year?”
His opening gambit was “what are you doing with yourself these days?” This is a tricky question. If I say ‘work’, they ask me about that, but seeing as I don’t know what I’m doing, it’s hard to explain to them, so we both end up confused. If I say I’m doing nothing, it sounds lazy, and it’s not true. I told him I was writing a book, and immediately regretted it.
He perked up and became interested. We had crossed the boundary of casual chat and had entered the realm of serious conversation, and I knew I was lost because I knew what was coming next.
“What’s the book about?”
I floundered. I hate that question. I never know what to say.
“It’s about life,” I said hopefully.
This, of course confused him. “Is it fact or fiction?” he asked.
Again I was stumped. “It’s sort of a bit of both, but it’s mainly fact.” I wasn’t going to tell him about blogging because he was confused enough already. And even if he was an avid blogger, he would only ask me what my blog is about. That’s another question that brings me out in a cold sweat.
“It’s about rambles,” I said hopefully.
“Ah! A book about walking?”
“No. Not that kind of rambles. It’s about what goes on in my head.”
This utterly bewildered him, so we were both now in the same boat.
He started to ask a couple more questions, but thought better of it, and finished the cutting in silence. He did a good job.
So, Dear Reader. I need your help.
What the fuck is this blog about?
How can I describe it in a couple of concise sentences that won’t have people reaching for the Prozac, or quietly phoning the men in white coats?
If you can do that, then you have more or less described the book.
You will be doing me a service and possibly saving my hairdresser’s sanity.
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I think, but I’m not sure, it’s about head rambles that have been topiaried which isn’t a real word so that fits - excellent - well done me *pats back and shuffles off*.
‘What the fuck is this blog about?’
If you haven’t worked that out what hope have we
I think your strapline “Rambles around the head of an Irish Senior Citizen” describes it perfectly - what could be added or subtracted that would improve upon such a succinct expression?
Daddy P - Topiaried Thoughs? Hmmmmm.
Grannymar - None whatsoever.
Ian - I don’t know, but that confuses me too
The high speed collision of rural fact and fantasy.
daily life seen through the tourist-tortured eyes of a respectable country gent.
maybe a little of that is true
Don’t know. Never read it.
Seeing as you have an annual haircut, that gives us 364 days to figure it out!
A dissertation on life, love and the joys of shooting tourists . .
Life and how I see it.
This blogs gives a voice to the observations of the insanity played out around us all every day, mixed with a small dash of the insanity inside our own heads.
I once heard that stress was the state of being wherby the mind over-rides the body’s desire to knock the shit out of some deserving bastard.
I think Head Rambles is a way of venting that stress, with only minor injuries to the general public (Tourists not included)
How about “Journey through the voices in my head”?
You question reminds me of the answer to “What is the meaning of life?” It doesn’t matter.
42
What’s a blog?
Well, the “head rambles of Grandad” is actually an anagram of “far gone mad balderdash”.
Well, I liked my answer, until I read Longman Oz’s - but here’s my take anyway, because I can’t afford to waste any thoughts.
“I punch a bunch of buttons on this machine, it strings together 1 & 0’s and arranges them on a screen for people to stare at.”
It’s like the Hokey-Pokey…THAT’S what it’s all about. (A little bit of everything!)
Hello again,
How about it’s a book about not suffering in silence, a compilation of gripes and grumbles and funny antidotes from the wit of an Irish Senior Citizen.
Ouch! I went out for a while. I didn’t expect this many responses, and I can’t reply to them individually.
There are some crackers there, though Johnie has me a little confused? Am I missing something?
Longman has too much time on his hands and Darren doesn’t.
Welcome back Shoo and thanks again!
It’s the ‘Gripes and Grumbles’ show ….. as presented by Grandad.
Pat Kenny will surely lend you his ‘owl’ for the opening credits!
I was going to say 42 as well! And I thought it would be original…
It’s the answer to life, the universe and everything according to The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Of course, this is the answer to life, the universe and everything according to Grandad, so maybe you’ll need a new number. 56?
Annual Haircut???
It’s about everything, really. It’s about about finding humour in the oddest things and everything that grinds your gears. Or in your case, everything that ruffles your beard.
Aging Angst?
Beards and Beer?
Comical Craic?
Half-baked Hilarium?
Jesting Jaunts?
Pipes and Pints?
Senior Satire?
Shall I go on?
42 = answer to the ultimate question in Hitch hikers guide to the galaxy. Turns up in the headers of Tiff files too. Nerdy nerdy nerdy nerdy nerdy……….. <—- Me
Y’all missed my point. (I think)
@tt, was referring to johnie’s answer.
Head Rambles is apparently about writing whatever the stuff is that comes into your head when you’re high on acid - I know your secrets - and then having random strangers you’ll never meet comment on it.
Wait a sec … this is a good trip, right?
The best trip yet! *Mmmmmmmm*
STUFF - hows that for what you write about ?
It’s about you and your opinion of stuff.Obviously we like it because we keep coming back.
@june in florida. I don’t - I’m actually taped to a chair here with my eyes pinned open. my wife keeps reloading the blog to see if Grandad’s said anything new today.
“my wife keeps reloading the blog to see if Grandad’s said anything new today”
Bloody hell! That makes me sound like some kind of religious oracle or something.
Well don’t know about an oracle… How about a portal to life - death and everything inbetween? On the other hand it could just be the ramblings of an old chap with a job in the secret service trying to throw everyone off the scent!
Geri - I have to deny that I work for the secret service. It’s part of the job description.