2008 May | Head Rambles

Archive for May, 2008

Granny Whiplash

Grandad May 20th, 2008

When one is on a pension, the opportunities for making an extra few bob are few and far between.

Herself got all excited on Sunday when she was reading the papers.

Apparently one of the great booming industries in Ireland at the moment is the sex trade.

“We could do with some extra money for the holidays,” she said, as she got out her knitting bag.

“Aren’t you a bit ahhhhh… mature?” I asked.

“Old?” says she. “Not at all. It’s easy. It’s so easy I could do it with my eyes closed, on the flat of my back and with both hands tied behind me.”

“If you think so,” I said. “But what about the dangers?”

“What dangers?”

“Diseases?” I suggested.

“Caveat emptor,” she replied with a snigger, as she cast on a new row of stitches.

“What about physical harm?”

“I’ll try to curb my temper,” she said as she laced into the plain and the purl.

“You’ll need protection,” I said.

“I’ll bring the frying pan.”

She certainly seemed to have all the answers.

I like Herself to get out and about. Between that and the macramé classes and the gardening club, she’ll have a busier life than me.

And the extra €5 a night will be handy.

granny

Green Post

Grandad May 19th, 2008

I was sitting here this morning when there was a crash from the front of the house.

I went to investigate and found that the post had arrived. The porch floor was covered with envelopes and things.

It’s nice to be loved. People have taken the trouble to write to me.

I gathered the armful of stuff and brought it in. I sorted it on the kitchen table – one pile of stuff to read, and one pile for recycling/burning/landfill/throwing over the neighbour’s wall.

I stood back and looked at the two piles.

The important pile had two sheets of paper – an electricity bill and a phone bill. They aren’t even that important, because I don’t bother paying them.

The other pile consisted of the envelopes, flyers, glossy brochures full of naked semi-clad women, glossy brochures full of garden furniture, glossy brochures telling me about a lot of crap that I didn’t want to know about. There were offers of broadband. There was an invite to join a gym eight miles away [hah!]. There was a letter from my bank telling me what a wonderful customer I am. I already know that.

The ESB even sent me two [identical] glossy brochures on how to save money. They could save me money by not printing those brochures and deducting the cost from my bill [that I don't pay].

It’s funny really. Everyone is on the Eco-bandwaggon. It’s politically correct to talk green. Let’s plant trees. Let’s watch our carbon footprint. Let’s be environmentally friendly.

But that’s all it is – talk.

Not one of them will do a fucking thing about it.

Is the Lisbon Treaty a con?

Grandad May 18th, 2008

“France was just ahead of all the other countries in voting No. It would happen in all Member States if they have a referendum. There is a cleavage between people and governments…There will be no Treaty if we had a referendum in France, which would again be followed by a referendum in the UK.”
- French President Nicolas Sarkozy, at meeting of MEP Group leaders, EUobserver, 14 Nov. 2007

“Public opinion will be led to adopt, without knowing it, the proposals that we dare not present to them directly … All the earlier proposals will be in the new text, but will be hidden and disguised in some way.”
- Former French President V.Giscard D’Estaing, Le Monde, 14 June 2007

“The substance of the Constitution is preserved. That is a fact.”
- German Chancellor Angela Merkel, speech to the European Parliament, 27 June 2007

“The Constitution is the capstone of a European Federal State.”
- Guy Verhofstadt, Belgian Prime Minister, Financial Times, 21 June 2004

- three_card_trick

I have been doing my best to understand this damned Treaty of Lisbon.

If it is so good for us, then people should be shouting the benefits from the rooftops.

Instead all I hear is the things it won’t change. Why are we voting for something that won’t change anything?

The Governments chief argument seems to be that we must vote YES otherwise Europe will think badly of us. That is the most pathetic reason for a vote ever. I could argue that a NO vote will earn us the eternal gratitude of every other country in Europe, as they don’t get a say. They are relying on us.

I have read other peoples’ analysis. Sara Carey has had some good debating on her site, and Darren has been doing some excellent detailed research.

The result seems to be that the EU is simplifying things. But if they are simplifying things, why is it so damned complicated?

I’m a great believer in gut feeling.

And my gut is screaming like it does after a feed of bad pints of stout and an over-ripe Vindaloo.

Something is very wrong somewhere.

Blog Post of the Month

Grandad May 17th, 2008

Some of you may have been wondering what that yoke is on my side bar?

This is Damien Mulley up to his tricks again.

Is there any limit to this bloke’s ideas? He is giving an award for Blog Post of the Month, every month.

I think it is a great idea, because it gives everyone an opportunity. I have nominated one or two posts [not any of my own, I hasten to add] and I hope they are in with a chance.

I got the badge from Le Craic [with permission] and I think it is a great piece of work.

Unfortunately, I have one or two problems with it.