A moving story
Grandad July 12th, 2008
This is the 12th of July. It is the height of Summer here in Ireland.
I just lit the central heating.
I am bloody freezing.
To warm myself up while waiting for the house to warm up, I started looking at houses for sale in France.
Fuel is going to get more expensive, and as we get older we are going to feel the cold more. So one alternative is to radically overhaul Head Rambles Manor and install a different heating system, but that will be expensive to do, and whatever heating we use, it’s going to be expensive.
The other alternative is to find a way where we don’t need so much heating. Move to a warmer climate.
I only searched for about five minutes when I came across a little place.
Well, when I say little, I mean the following:
Entrance from a front terrace into a well equipped country-style kitchen and open plan dining room , beautiful central lounge has a huge, fully functioning stone fireplace, underfloor heating, high beams, exposed stone and a wonderful galleried landing around two sides, walkway to the open library area, garden is about ½ an acre with a 10 x 5 m swimming pool (fully fenced), barn and a second open barn used as a covered parking area, small ruin at the back of the garden.
It also happens to be in our favourite part of France. The temperature there is around 30 Celsius, as it is most summers.
I did some sums.
If we sold this place now [even allowing for the recession] and bought that one, we would have about half a million Euros left over. Yup – €500,000. I think that would supplement the pension quite nicely?
Jayzus, but I’m tempted. It makes sense. The more I think about it, the more I like the idea.
There is only one problem…..
Je ne parle pas Francais.
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Are you kidding me? Seriously, you have that opportunity, half a million euro left over and you’re worried about not having french?
I’d be packing the bags already.
http://www.bonjour.com/
Now, there’s one excuse down. Next ??
Darragh – No harm in thinking? Head Rambles Manor has been valued well in excess of a million [nothing unusual in the Godforsaken country?] and that property is €428,500 including all fees, taxes and agent’s fees.
Next? What about leaving all my friends behind?
France. Yes, but does it have broadband, barrier free toll roads, RTE, LUAS, Puck Fair, the Rose of Tralee, SuperMacs, Shaws (almost Nationwide), Donie Cassidy, Frawleys or the Athlone by-pass?
I should think again Grandad. Nearly forgot me pint. Cheers!
I reckon you’d find that your friends would be even closer, with the new chance to visit you in France. Equally you could always come stay with them here.
How often would you meet your “non-virtual” friends anyways? Would it be weekly? Fortnightly? Monthly? Does it depend on when you’re all free? And if you didn’t meet up as regularly, would it mean that the friendship would suffer?
One of the greater teases for me every week is the property section of the Irish Times where it compares prices of two bed run down semis in Drimnagh with French chateaus with hectares, views and room for a pony. It drives me mad every time.
As you say, no harm in thinking. I’d certainly be thinking about it a lot!
(With the help of Google maps, the local estate agents number, the prospects of getting broadband there, are swimming pools easy to clean, is the local town nearby etc etc…)
The only two important things there are broadband and toll free roads. Yes to both [and the broadband is a hell of a sight faster and cheaper]. I would really miss Pat The Plank, Harney and The Gang though.
Darragh – Bed and Breakfast?? Hmmm? We meet [non-virtual] friends pretty often, and I’d miss them.
The more I think about this, the more I like it though. As you say, with Interweb access I can all but walk the streets in my chosen location. I’m not worried about swimming pools though. I don’t swim, and would probably turn it into something useful, like an underground wine-vat.
Shit! They don’t have Guinness………
with that amount of money left over you could import your own guiness! maybe become *the* importer for guiness in france
you got me thinking about my dream house this morning. it’s in tuscany and i want it…where are my lottery winnings…i just know they are coming! here’s the link to *casa limone* http://www.casalimone.co.uk/
i could even deal with the color!
The world is such a small place now moving to France would be not be such an issue. Before moving here my main concern was getting to see my son regularly, back in the UK. It is now easier and cheaper for me to fly there than drive the 250 miles that separated us. Skype and broadband make communicating easier, and a man of your brainpower would pick up French easily.
Not bad, Prin! I’ll buy it for you if you let me live in the second house?
On second thoughts – whatever about my French, I have no Italian at all, at all.
KingBob – It’s true about Skype and the like, though it’s not quite the same as having a pint and a pipe in the pub. Damnit! I could nearly buy a small plane?
a pipe? in a pub? maybe you would be better off in france.
We don’t hold with any of that namby pamby Nanny State shite in this area, Kerryview. I’d miss that. I’d have to train them in in France…
you absolutely could live in the second house! I was just going to move all my friends there with me anyway
it’s big enough! about italian…call me stupid but I thought most countries involved in wwII had a passing knowledge of english…anyway that’s what babelfish is for isn’t it? I figured I would be like that little ole greek grandmother I had for a landlord once. she spoke no english, except when it came time to pay the rent, then she spoke quite good english! you would only have to speak french or italian for the necessities. you could just learn the standard french/italian phrases for, say… wtf?, where’s the bathroom?, why are you here?, do you have guiness? etc. etc 
Prin – It is very generous of you, But I’m more used to the French way of life. I have enough to say the above in French, though I never would ask for a Guinness there – I value my health too much.
The bloody Europeans have followed suit with the non-smoking arse as well. No refuge anywhere. I must admit the one thing I miss is a pub, however there is an excellent cafe culture in France which is almost as good, and to a degree more sociable. My father in law made a classic error when in Fnance, he was asking for a loaf of bread, the lady was adamant he couldn’t buy it, he kept pointing at a loaf hanging in the window, she gave her Gallic shrug and said slowly:
“Non,Monsiour, vous ne comprendez, c’est plastique”
I say move to France and use that half mil’ to hire a translator
BTW, I’m quite handy with the French myself
http://tinyurl.com/6fw4oy
There you go Granddad, and a fair share of that half mil left over.
J’ai Parle Francais! pas de problem. We need a pad in Wickla too!
King Bob – Bread is slightly different there all right. No toast! I wonder if you can toast a plastic loaf…..?
TheChrisD – Do I really want you tagging on my heels all the time?? Are you hygienic? Do you even speak French?
Xbox – Heh! You’ve Just done TheChrisD out of a job
Granny – Yeah. Roish! Francais avec une Galway accent! I have seen you drive market stallholders to tears.
Not speaking French did not seem to trouble Peter Mayle
. . . and Nicolas Sarkozy would provide you with every bit as much entertainment as the late Taoiseach.
Welcome back, Ian.
“Grandad en France”? Sarkozy’s missus is better looking too
@Grandad. Speak French, yes. Hygenic, well other people seem to be the judge of that.
@Xbox: If it wasn’t for the fact your name contains of the greatest pieces of machinery ever built, you’d be ruing that comment
If you’re going to do it, do it now. There’s a reason why tiny semi-ds in Drimnagh appear to be worth more than a French château; our house prices have very little basis in reality, as we’re now finding out.
Think back to what your house was worth in 2001/2002 (plus or minus 10%), that’s more like its “true” value. Of course property, like everything else, is only worth what somebody will pay for it. So if you can get, take it, go to France, if you don’t like it, you’ll be able to buy back into Wickla much cheaper in a few years (maybe able to hold on to the French pile as well!).
Mind you, who ever buys your place might well knock down your father’s gate post and widen the lane!!!
Tom
Tom – Actually I am basing the price of this place on a valuation I had made in 2000, which should give me a slightly pessimistic figure. I have been doing more research today and we reckon that with an expenditure of €300,000 we can get a very nice place in France, a smaller place here and still have a bit left over.
As for the gate post – I have a huge sentimental attachment to the place here, but I know my father would be the first to tell me to seize the day. If they want to widen the lane, I will be long gone..
You could always booby-trap the gate post or with some of the spare cash, write and publish a collection of modern Wicklow ghost stories, with an illustration of “the lane that must never be widened or great misfortune will befall…” on the front cover. Or better still, do both.
Tom
Tom – I like the idea of booby-trapping it. Maybe if I hollowed it out and filled it with Nitroglycerin?
…and then carve ogham markings on it, make it attractive to tourists. “Kill two birds with the one stone”!
Tom – It’s a pity I put that photograph up showing my father building it. I could have claimed it was an ancient Neolithic monument and got the Heritage crowd to fence it in. What is “Fuck Off” in Ogham??
Don’t know, but the Norman Irish would use something like this … http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Sheelanagigfethardwall.jpg
Ha! You link to a dirty picture, and you get slammed as spam. This is an intelligent site
I’m guessing herself will be needing hired help in France. I’d be foreign in France
Little Miss – I just told Herself about your offer. She says her cup runneth over. She was worried about getting help over there, and wants to know if you have a firm hand with a loo-brush?
I have been know to use one on occasion. I’m pretty mean in the kitchen though I like making things look shiny.
I also thought I could double up as a pool side ornament.
We hadn’t thought of employing a pool side ornament. Send photo.
Unfortunately I’m not of this world naturally and images of me cannot be captured on camera.
If you are not of this world, how are you going to do the ironing?
I have my ways. Man I hate interviews!
If you think this is bad, you should try working for Herself!