Free parking
Grandad August 9th, 2008
I had to go into town yesterday.
As you may have gathered, I hate driving into town. I hate the traffic, and I hate all the traffic lights. But most of all I hate finding parking.
Parking in town is a nightmare, as they have removed all the car parks. And then they have the gall to charge me if I do find a spare space.
I cruised around and actually found a space just outside the opticians.
This was fairly lucky, as it was the opticians I was going to, to pick up the first of my pairs of glasses.
I was going to nip in and collect them, and not bother with paying for the parking, but then I realised there was a warden sniffing around.
I hate parking wardens.
He was an ugly brute, but I went up to him and said “excuse me”.
He glowered at me, because I presume he thought I was going to pick a fight.
I gave him my most endearing smile, which isn’t easy when faced with a parking warden, and told him I had no change for the meter. I said I was just going to nip into the nearest shop and get some, and would he mind looking after the car while I was gone.
He must have been relieved that there wasn’t a row in the offing, because he agreed to do it.
I nipped into the opticians, and collected my glasses. They are my prescription sunglasses, but they haven’t put the tint on yet, so I don’t have to look like someone from the CIA all the time.
I came out of the shop and the warden was still there, looking after the car and chatting to Sandy, who by now was sitting in the driver’s seat.
I thanked him profusely, and said that the shop wouldn’t give me change, and that I was too honest to park without paying so I would have to go home and come back another day. This impressed him, and he said that was no problem and wished me a safe journey.
The glasses are nice. I can see better than ever.
I like them.
But most of all, I like parking wardens.
- Around the town
- Comments(14)
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Hmm… Those must be some kind of glasses! Mine don’t make me look honest and cherubic at all and when I used to park (no car now) wardens were always clamping my back wheel! I reckon it was your beard deluding the warden into thinking of Father Christmas, twinkly lights, presents and good will towards men… Ha!
tsk tsk tsk, isnt this kinda like cheating the system. My brother does this kinda thing all the time. He reckons its fair enough – they take away perfectly fine parking spaces and use them for footpaths and trees and ornaments and flower pots etc then expect people to park up for the scarce parking spots.
Ah Geri, Christmas is truly in the air. As I was leaving work yesterday, someone wished me merry christmas!
Oooooooh, I made it to the top commentators list
Traffic wardens?
They must have mellowed since forty years ago. There used to be a photograph on the web of a moment after the Bristol floods of 1968, I can now only find a text description:
“On Friday 12th July a traffic warden, watched by disbelieving bus crews, put parking tickets on five double decker buses outside Bristol Hippodrome. The buses had been brought in from outside the city as emergency relief vehicles to supplement the City’s flood depleted fleet”.
It would have been a different story if he had given you a ticket anyway – which happened to me once.
Traffic wardens/cops/clampers aren’t real people. They’re bred in the lab of an evil genius somewhere. Either that or they fail the entrance aptitude test for Templemore.
mmmm for my thoughts on this subject check this out!
http://www.iramble.co.uk/2008/06/jobsworth-strikes-again
I obviously don’t have the ‘endearing’ look!!! Well done Grandad!
Well done Grandad. It’s probably something you can only do when the shop you need to go to is right in front of the dream parking spot.
I too am one of those mythical, charmed and unspeakably lucky people who have managed to escape the ire – and ticketing – of parking inspectors.
…..of course I had to shag them behind the bus shelter whilst my nephew videoed us, but it was well worth the effort….
I try my best to avoid criticising all professions in case I wind up in them.
Geri – For mentioning the ‘C’ word, you are to sit on the naughty step for a week.
Charmed – You too.
Ian – That is called devotion to duty. Sadly lacking these days.
Kate – I read that
Nice one.
Kath – Do you have any of those videos going spare?
BBB – So that’s what you do for a living??
Now why do I think that you would have come out only to find a ticket attached to your car if you hadn’t had Sandy along?
I think I know what happened to most of your typical parking wardens. They all have immigrated to the USA and work for the TSA as airport screeners. While most people who work in security have an under developed sense of humor, some claim that it is surgically removed in training. the TSA compounds it with an extreme case of stupidity.
Kirk M – You’re a terrible cynic. The fact that she had his nuts in her mouth had nothing to do with it.
Jim – From what I have heard, they are all working in
the KGBHomeland Security?Ohhh the airport security screeners are crazy now and not in a fun way…
The meter maid here in our small down town is actually a real tall fellow. Which is great because you can see him coming from a mile away. This works well when I am illegally parked down by the library.
[...] A few days ago, I took the piss out of parking wardens. [...]