Archive for December 5th, 2008

I’m being stalked

Grandad December 5th, 2008

A while ago, I signed up with Twitter.

I did it for the same reasons I started this site, and also joined Facebook and all those other shite “networking” sites – to see what would happen.

This site is all right.  It’s a bit of craic, and I’m glad I started it.

Facebook is a pain in the hole and the only things it is good for is sending me annoying mails, and for buying and selling people.  I’m getting good at the latter and I am now have assets of $15 million which will be handy if they reduce my pension any more.  It also has the added benefit that I own some fairly tasty pieces of female, which I presumably can call upon, should the need arise.

Twitter though has me baffled.  I am stumped.  I am bewildered.  I am confused.

What the fuck is it for?

The odd time I write something inane, and it vanishes off to that unknown place they call the cybersphere.  It’s like sending a radio signal into space – it’s out there somewhere, but nobody is likely to hear it.

Other people are sending inane messages too, so the whole thing is a bit surreal.

Now don’t get me wrong.  There are some very important messages floating around.  In the last couple of days, I have learnt that someone missed his bus.  I also learned that someone else got his first Christmas card.  These are important news items and should be at the top of the Six O’Clock News on RTE.  I would love to hear Sharon Ní Beoláin reading them out.  Mind you, I don’t mind what she reads out as long as I can fanaticise as she is reading it.

Another disconcerting aspect of Twitter is that I keep getting emails.

Every now and then, I get a message saying the Joe Bloggs or someone is now following me on Twitter.

There are quite a few people following me now, but I don’t know why.  Why follow someone when you know that they know they don’t know where they are going?  It doesn’t make sense.  I have this mental picture of myself wandering across the mountains with a couple of dozen people trailing me from a distance waiting to see what I do next.  It is a little unnerving to say the least.

Or are they stalking me?

Damn!

Now I’m really worried.