New horizons
Grandad June 9th, 2009
A few people have asked me why I am giving up my little business.
There are a few reasons.
Silver Haired Internet Technologies [S.H.I.T.] has been running for a while now and has been surprisingly successful. There was talk of being quoted on the New York Stock Exchange, but we must be thankful for small mercies.
Income has been damned good, and therein lies the first reason for quitting. Those fuckers got to hear about it in the tax office and they started sending me bills. I retaliated to submitting counterclaims, and to date, I am winning. My Dad always taught me to quit while I’m ahead, so that is the first reason.
The main reason is that my laptop is running very slowly.
You see, web design requires quite a few programmes, and they take up a lot of disk space and a lot of memory. Worst of all though is all the crap I am left with cluttering up my machine. I have all the copies of the web sites and all the files that I never used but keep ‘just in case’. 40Gb is just too much when it clashes with my large collection of porn photographs.
There are other reasons of course. I am getting a little tired of people phoning me at four in the morning complaining that they have just received an email offering them a larger penis. I usually reply that if they had a larger penis they might find something more interesting to do at four in the morning than reading emails. I am getting good at customer relations, and it’s a pity to waste that talent, but that’s life.
I am also getting complaints from the neighbours about the sign on the lane. I had trouble with clients finding Head Rambles Manor so I had to put a large sign at the entrance to my lane saying “S.H.I.T. HERE”. My neighbours are very intolerant for some reason.
So the wind down is proceeding. It’s taking time, but it’s hard to kill a good thing.
I want to concentrate on my new business.
Anyone want to buy a pill that guarantees to enlarge your member by eighteen inches?
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- Comments(13)
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please send a large supply of those pills to Gordon Brown asap as he has a lot of members that need enlargement. Up until now they’ve been doing it via expenses living off the fat of the (our) land.
Mike – You lot don’t know you’re born!! You have MPs who are caught out fiddling paltry sums of money who then have the decency to resign. We have to cope with bastards who pay themselves rediculous salaries, who refuse to take paycuts despite taxing OAPs and the unemployed and who grant themselves massive pensions while still in office. I admire your lot, to be honest!
Another 18 inches? What would I do with a 36 inch penis?
So the last one I sent you worked?
Maxi, if you had a 36 inch penis you would use two hands.
Can’t Understand Nothin’ Today. There Was A Time.
The people of South Dublin enlarged their member by far more than eighteen inches – but they were starting out with Minnie Brennan
Shame that but where one door closes, another door opens, send your referrals to http://www.speshdesign.com . . .I get a cut and god knows my bank account could do with some enlargement!
Brianf – He already does [and both feet].
Ian – Minnie Brennan? Of the Riordans?
Baino – Take it from an expert – you do not want to be lumbered with some of my clients!! Incidentally, if you want that cut, you’ll need to get the address right! Heh!
It is right
“enlarge your member by eighteen inches”
Is that not a disease?
Oh no, that’s those big elephant-sized balls …
Nora
No, I think that’s the disease they call “Boxcar Willie”…
Baino – It is right now.