Climax
Grandad August 24th, 2009
It has been a while, so I was feeling a little apprehensive.
Putting my nerves to one side, I firmly grasped my rod and gently steered it towards it’s destiny.
As I inserted it, I felt somewhat more resistance than I remembered, so I very gently pressed in.
Suddenly I felt that glorious feeling as my rod slipped smoothly into the darkness.
Gently moving my hips, I thrust further and further in. The further in I got, the harder I thrust, my rod vibrating and pulsing. The further I got, the more I screwed and thrust, until there was that wonderful feeling of release.
I am not one of those who just pulls out at this moment, so as I withdrew, I slowly and rhythmically pulsed in and out. I took my time, and it felt good.
Finally, I was out.
I felt satisfied.
A job well done.
I have been meaning to sweep that fucking chimney for ages.
- Around the house
- Comments(14)
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If you need to sweep the chimney it means you don’t get the fire hot enough. Next time, just add some Thermite and you will never have to strain your hips again. Or you could stuff a politician up the chimney and light a fire under him/her.
That was so funny Grandad, so funny in fact I copied it, word for word, and put it on the F2C forum, blogs section. And no, I’m no relation to Billy C, I’m as funny as a fart in a spacesuit.
That is great GD!
What a post! LOL
Our chimney went on fire just a week before we left—a slow burn that we didn’t even notice until FINALLY Himself came in and said, “Why is our chimney smoking, when we haven’t had a fire all week??”
Ooooops….
Congratulations on a good job well done!
…what’s a chimney?
Funnily enough TheChrisD I should be asking the same question, haven’t seen one since I lived in the tenements in Glasgow as a boy in the fifties and early sixties but since the smokeless act came in that’s all they are, just a memories…but the smell of a newly lit fire after we had put a five year old up to clean it was….ahhhh bliss.
Brian – The old petrol trick used to work very well, untill the fuckers in the Council started charging for every callout. It’s cheaper to do it the hard way now.
BigYin – You changed the fourth last word. Fuck that.
Popeye – I removed the grate first.
Susan – A fire in summer? What were you thinking of? Oh, wait… Irish summer. Yes. Of course.
TheChrisD – A thing you stuff grandchildren up. Ask BigYin. He’ll tell you all about it.
BigYin – I have to agree. There is nothing like the smell of a nicely roasting five year old.
Did herself recognise you afterwards? last time the chimney was swept here there was soot all over the place! Some bright spark said it would have been better to give it a b… job!
Did you and the chimney smoke a cig afterward?
Mick – As clean as a whistle [and if you had seen my whistle, you'd know how clean that is].
RhodesTer – I had a grand smoke. The chimey didn’t. [it had just been swept, you see?]
That is soooo funny Grandad.
Hundreds of years ago, they had huts with fires and no chimney lol, saved on the chimney sweep, they must have had strong lungs in them days or we would not be here.
Mandyv – But we all know that the effects of smoke are grossly exaggerated?
Apart from the the new Temperance movement Grandad, and the easy to scare peeps lol.
And here I was just moodily pushing my browser about the Web, doing the same damn thing that I’ve been doing every night, thinking on how I hadn’t accomplished anything online all freakin’ day just like every other damn day and just before I shut down I bring up my reader and I read this post.
Wiped the frown right from my face and I’m still chuckling so thanks, Grandad. A but more of this and I might actually get motivated again.
.-= Kirk M´s last brainfart .. Reviving the Dead | Part III =-.