Who is Tiger Woods?
Grandad April 6th, 2010
The news was on the television last night, but I had the sound turned down.
Yer Man – what’s his name – the black fella – Tiger Woods was shown strutting around and being interviewed.
I turned up the sound a bit to see what crime he had committed, and fuck me, but they were all talking in hushed reverent tones about him. He is making his first public appearance since his minor major indiscretions were revealed.
So fucking what?
Here is a bloke who stuck his mickey in a few places where he shouldn’t and the missus caught him out. It’s all part of the great game of life. It goes on in every fucking parish in the world, so there is no startling news there.
What is Tiger Woods world famous for? Apart from having a stupid name, he is world famous for whacking a ball around a field with a fucking stick and for screwing a few waitresses! How daft is that? If he had discovered perpetual motion, or was the person who solved Fermat’s Last Theorem, then maybe I could just understand, but hitting a ball into a hole in the ground? Fuck off!! And now they are making a huge deal about his making a comeback?
During a press conference, he put on a meek doleful voice and said that from henceforth he was going to give a good example to people. What idiot is going to take example from a golfer? Is he the new Messiah? Is he the new spiritual leader of the world? I know we could badly do with one, but a fucking golfer? He needs to be taken down a peg or two.
I don’t even like him. He plays like an automaton, with no sense of playing a game, which is all it is. It’s not fucking rocket science. There is no art or talent involved – just a bit of practice.
I could beat him any day.
I can guarantee he can’t sail one of Sandy’s dried deposits through the neighbour’s window like I can.
Tosser.
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The man has s recognisable addiction Grandad and he has a whole support group for his affliction…he’s a sex addict. The man needs our understanding and sympathy, after all, he’s not a smoker, is he. (I’m fairly sure there’s a law about ridiculing someone with that terrible affliction, and if there isn’t there will be soon.)
If I stood next to Tiger, would I catch what he’s got?
.-= TheBigYin´s last brainfart .. It’s official, the longer you smoke the thicker you get! =-.
Addiction, my bollix! Just because he can’t keep his niblick in his trousers he has to have some fucking syndrome or clinical malfunction? He’s just a randy little fuck [fair play to him].
I don’t doubt that there is such thing as sex addiction but in Tiger Woods case I am inclined towards the fact that he is just an extremely wealthy man who uses that to his benefit with women who fall for his lines and jump in the sac with him.
I have no sympathy for the man whatsoever. He was caught by the short and curlies and his sheen as the good boy of sport has been well and truly tarnished.
Having said all that, it was all over-hyped and reported. I couldnt give a shite about him or his family much the same way I couldnt give a shite about my old neighbours in Tallaght who used to air their dirty linen in public regularly.
Oh dear .. no sympathy for the loaded celebrity who got caught shagging around. So obviously he has to have a medical condition in order to smooth his path from ‘busted’ to ‘victim’.
I like the sex addiction one- men are programmed by (look away now America) evolution to spread the seed, dude.
Monogamy is not natural. For millions of years men have been obeying an instinct every bit as verifiable as women’s PMT and spreading the old DNA around.
Stupid fucker went and got married. His fault.
“Could frame thy fearfull symmetry.”
He is probably the best golfer around. Ever. But he’s a guy and guys are not by nature monogamous. Sorry ladies; it’s just a fact.
Golf .. hitting a little white ball with a knobbly ended stick .. and then chasing after it to repeat the exercise .. I ask you .. What’s that all about then .. Eh ?
So, this “Tiger” tosser’s been caught dipping his wick in someone else’s damp bunker …. and ???
True for you, Gramps!
.-= Tessa´s last brainfart .. Sticks and stones =-.
I’d like to hear somebody give thanks to mother earth for the eternal truth about golf. If she hadn’t provided us with the miracle of gravity nobody would be able to get the fecking ball into the hole. Well I guess I just did (thank her, that is) so never mind the rest of you lining up to get on my bandwagon.
Golf. A good walk, ruined.
Woods. A randy man. He got caught. Silly fecker. End of.
But please, no more shite about addictions. The media lap that shit up and vomit it back out. Endlessly. I get tired of these “poor” multi-millionaires bleating all the livelong day.
Fuck off. And when you get there, fuck off again.
CR.
.-= Captain Ranty´s last brainfart .. Ranty’s Manifesto =-.
More captains than you can shake a stick at.
The only thing I will say on this subject is that it does give new meaning to ‘playing through eighteen holes’?
TT – I am a little confused by all this ‘Captain’ business? Who is promoting them all? Where are the Privates and the Sargeants? Are there no Majors? Fucking weird.
Captain Grandad