Ash my arse
Grandad April 19th, 2010
I’m getting a little tired of this volcano thing.
The television is full of it. The newspapers are full of it. My car is covered in it.
I asked Herself what she thought about it. “I feel sorry for all the people trying to go to Switzerland for euthanasia” was her reply. I didn’t pursue the topic.
Personally, I am indifferent to the whole thing. I haven’t flown for years, and nor do I intend to for a very long time. Actually, life is quieter now, with no jets flying overhead. It reminds me of the 50s when we used to run outside if we heard an aeroplane as it was such a rarity. I also vote we revert to calling the Dun Laoire ferry “the Mail Boat” once more. It was always called that in my day.
For a volcano that is the top item in the news every day, it manages to remain remarkably anonymous. It is always referred to as The Icelandic Volcano, or just plain The Volcano. The reason being that with typical Icelandic cuteness, they named the mountain Eyjafjallajökull, and no one here dares mention it by name. I have even heard a theory that the whole business is a conspiracy by the BBC’s Pronunciation Department who triggered the eruption in retaliation for all the crap-speak on radio and television these days.
I tried researching “Eyjafjallajökull” to see what the name means. Strangely, most translation packages convert it to “Eyjafjallajökull”, which wasn’t much help. I did some further research into some ancient Icelandic scriptures and came up with a possible meaning – roughly translated, it means “Fuck you Europe, we’re not paying the cash”. That seems reasonable?
I presume the winds of change mean that the whole topic will soon blow over? It’s a terrible pity they couldn’t have arranged the eruption for just a month earlier, so all our esteemed government would have been trapped overseas. It would have given our economy a chance to recover.
I only have one thing bothering me now.
Who in Iceland gets the bill for my car wash?
Subscribe to audio
