Good news

April 30th, 2010

Will someone please cheer me up?

Is there anyone out there with some news that I am not aware of?

Has there been a very nasty plain crash where our entire government was wiped out and only the crew survived unhurt?

Have real scientists discovered a gene that causes people to be rabid anti smokers, and also causes a very fatal and painful cancer?

Have all the climate change ‘scientists’ been eaten by polar bears?

Has the EU decided that enough is enough and is disbanding?

Have Jedward decided to join a gay monastery?

Has someone accidentally nuked the Vatican?

Come on.

The must be some good news out there?

25 Responses to “Good news”

  1. robert IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 2:26 pm

    I won a tenner on a scratch card.

  2. Séamus UNITED STATESon 30 Apr 2010 at 2:33 pm

    Newsflash! a vaccine created for prostate cancer which will cost $ 93k but which is not a cure but will extend life for four months, how special .. think I’d take the $93k to Vegas and have one hell of a last blast ;)

  3. Cap'n Con UNITED KINGDOMon 30 Apr 2010 at 2:35 pm

    Me too Grandad. I had a scratchcard with a tenner prize on it and I must have dropped it near my mate Bob’s house.

  4. brian IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:04 pm

    Gerry Ryan is dead – does that cheer you up?

  5. Captain Ranty UNITED KINGDOMon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:04 pm

    Seamus,
    So we can assume Al Megrahi (he of Lockerbie bombing fame) has had 4 of these vaccinations then?
    I just got back from Libya where I watched him play a full 90 minutes for Tripoli United. He scored twice.
    There’s some good news for ya Grandad! Prisoner with 3 months to live beats the odds and is released only to be cavorting like a young horse minutes after arriving in his homeland.
    Praise Allah!
    CR.

  6. The Bad Ambassador NETHERLANDSon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:06 pm

    Ditto re: Gerry Ryan.

  7. Si IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:06 pm

    Sorry Grandad, there’s no good news today, just more bad news.  Gerry Ryan is dead R.I.P.
    http://www.breakingnews.ie/ireland/gerry-ryan-found-dead-455930.html
     

  8. Grandad IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:06 pm

    Robert – I’m delighted for you, but is that supposed to cheer me up?

    Seamus – Thanks, but that isn’t quite on the lines of news that would chher me up.  I suppose it would if I were a pharmaceutical company?

    Con – Let’s both call around to Robert’s house and beat him up?  We could afford a couple of pints after?

  9. Quiet Reader on 30 Apr 2010 at 3:06 pm

    This is all I could come up with for now.

    Brown’s Election Campaign a Car Crash
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/election/article-1269986/General-Election-2010-Labour-campaign-descends-farce-car-crashes-poster-launch.html

    No, I don’t take sides.  I know they are ALL puppets for Global Government.

  10. Cap'n Con UNITED KINGDOMon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:14 pm

    Gerry Ryan dead and Joe Duffy lives. That Holy Ghost chappie needs to go to Specsavers.

  11. Grandad IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:18 pm

    Actually I’m sad to hear about Gerry.  I knew him quite well in my working days.  He could be a bit of an arsehole at times, but off-air I found him to be a very nice bloke [compared to some!]

    Quiet Reader – Another disgruntled voter?  Another bigot?

  12. Grandad IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:19 pm

    Con – That is cruel.  Why am I laughing?

  13. Tessa CANADAon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:19 pm

    I got a perfect score on Wii squash today.

  14. Grandad IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 3:29 pm

    Tessa – That is wonderful!  Cangratulations.  I’m so happy.  *sigh*

  15. Cap'n Con UNITED KINGDOMon 30 Apr 2010 at 4:14 pm

    ‘Wii squash’ meant something entirely different in my day. Getting a perfect score at the old version would have made Tessa very very popular.
     
     

  16. Cap'n Con UNITED KINGDOMon 30 Apr 2010 at 4:15 pm

    We shall never forget you Terry Ryan.

  17. tt UNITED STATESon 30 Apr 2010 at 4:18 pm

    Wife asks her husband for one of those “rape alarms.” He says ok. Next morning at 7 he grabs her by the throat, flips her on her back, fucks her up the arse and screams……. “TIME TO GET UP BITCH.”

  18. Grandad IRELANDon 30 Apr 2010 at 4:22 pm

    Con – Terry who?

    TT – You haven’t been taking your pills.  Have you?

  19. Tessa CANADAon 30 Apr 2010 at 5:05 pm

    Gramps, I’m so glad I could bring a little happiness into your day.
    Cap’n Con, you know, that explains so much.
    tt, not even remotely funny.
     

  20. Geri Atric NETHERLANDSon 01 May 2010 at 8:35 am

    Something world shattering did happen last night GD. The planet got sucked down a black hole  and we are all now strung out like spaghetti. We just haven’t noticed it yet. All too busy walking around with our heads stuck up our… black holes.

  21. Captain Con on 01 May 2010 at 9:36 am

    Geri Atric- heh- ta. That one certainly cheered me up!

  22. Dennis Cox CANADAon 01 May 2010 at 7:42 pm

    Ronald McDonald was arrested for pot possession.
    I got bail and my STD checkup came back clear.

  23. snookertony AUSTRALIAon 03 May 2010 at 4:52 am

    Some news to cheer you up, you say.
    My little lad informed his class we were getting a new pet – a hedgehog.
    Teacher asked, what, a hedgehog?
    Yes,  says he, Mum said so this morning. I heard her tell dad that if he tidied up the garage and did the hoovering she’d give him a hedgehog that night.
     
    Ah, come on. It’s an oldie but a goldie.
     
    I could have told you something truthful…

  24. AM in Brussels LUXEMBOURGon 03 May 2010 at 11:13 am

    What is your gripe against the EU?  Really?  Personally, I’d hate to think what the country would be like without it.

  25. Grandad IRELANDon 03 May 2010 at 2:01 pm

    Denis – You may want to get a second opinion on that STD thing?

    Snookertony – Go on.  They truth may hurt, but it may give us all a laugh?

    AM in Brussels – Congratulations!  You have inspired a post!

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