Killing God
Grandad May 18th, 2010
Summer must have arrived.
In the space of half an hour, I have just swatted two wasps.
But then it occurred to me – isn’t it a bit of a coincidence having two wasps in half an hour, when I haven’t seen a single one before this?
There is only one answer.
The first wasp must have resurrected himself.
Fuck!
I have just killed a god.
- Around the house
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No. It means you have a wasps’ nest. Good luck with that.
Wasps can be tricky. Sometimes they pretend they’re dead, but if you look closely, you’ll see they have one eye open. I’d be careful…wear bicycle clips on the legs of the trousers…nothing more dangerous that a pissed-off wasp on a bit of a ramble.
Not Twitter – Shit. Does that mean I have to burn down the neighbour’s extension again?
Eddie – I’m fairly sure the first one was dead. Unless a wasp can be stunned without his entrails? Heh!
I was attacked by a weird little tank of an insect yesterday. Went out cycling last night (to get some cans). When I was just getting back to the house, I felt a sting on the left of my next, reached up, and felt a huge fucking monster of a thing clinging to my hair.
I’ve no idea if it scratched me or bit me, and frankly don’t want to think about it. Whacked it to the ground (I panic around insects for some idiotic reason), and thought it was a snail by its size and the sound it made hitting the ground.
Didn’t occur to me until I had the door open that snails don’t fly, so how did it get in my hair?
Got pictures of the thing and a friend of mine recognised it as a “Cockchafer”.
Luckily it went for the hair on the head, or I’d be in trouble.
Zombie wasps? could be a movie deal if you write the book.
Kae – With a name like Cockchafer, you got off lightly!!! I know those yokes. Totally harmless, but you still get a bit twitchy if they are found somewhere they shouldn’t be. My answer – stop watching horror films?
Jim C – Attack of the Zombie Wasps? Surely it has been done? Now if someone suggested Attack of the Killer Tomatoes……..
There’s a few White Anglo-Saxon Protestants around where I live. But I’d rarely see two in one day.