Archive for July, 2010

A birthday surprise

July 15th, 2010

It has been a busy day.

Our K8 arrived here at the crack of dawn [around half eleven] when I wasn’t fully awake so the day got off to a rocky start.  I couldn’t complain, because it’s her birthday.  Birthdays are important occasions to five [and three quarter] year old granddaughters, so it had to be celebrated in style.  We managed to avoid the party hats and merely demolished a few bottles of wine so it was a quiet visit.

I just dropped them all home.

On the way back I called into the village to restock on my apples, as Puppychild had made free with the last of my stash.

While I was in the village, Herself phoned me.

“Are you going into the butchers?” she asked.

I said I would be passing it.

“Surprise me,” says she “and bring home some fresh meat.  Make sure it’s lean, fresh and fat free.”

I surprised her all right.

I brought home the girl from behind the counter.

A chat with supershadow

July 14th, 2010

I don’t normally mock the feeble minded.

However, when they come absolutely begging for it, it is a temptation that is too hard to resist.  Heh!

I have received another mail from my ‘Caring Reader’

i just saw your article. ye all think ye are some kind of celebrity bloggers.

100 years from who will care about ‘headrambles’ or ‘maxicane’

YE ARE NOTHING MORE THAN VIRTUAL SHIPS THAT PASS IN THE NITE.

never to be seen again

supershadow.com gets thousands of hits a day. how many does you and your cabal get?

everybody wants to be me. thats right go in to facebook and search for mickey suttle and you will get loads of imitators. now try the same with ‘headrambles’ or some other obscure member of you blogroll.

people are so jealous of me they post  misinformation, just like this:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/SuperShadow

but you know what grandad –jealousy is greatest form of flattery.

Good day

M E suttle (the magnificent, the great supershadow)

i just saw your article. ye all think ye are some kind of celebrity bloggers.

Me?  A celebrity blogger?  Fuck off.  I’m just a bloke who has a life.

100 years from who will care about ‘headrambles’ or ‘maxicane’

In a hundred years from now, I doubt very much if I will give a flying shit about Headrambles.  Maybe my great great grandchildren will, but I very much doubt it.  I can’t speak for Maxi though.  You’d need to ask him directly. 

YE ARE NOTHING MORE THAN VIRTUAL SHIPS THAT PASS IN THE NITE.

Ah!  Good.  You have discovered the Caps Shift key.  You really ought to use it more often.  Especially at the beginning of sentences.  And that’s not how ‘night’ is spelt.

supershadow.com gets thousands of hits a day. how many does you and your cabal get?

I don’t know why you are concerned about supershadow.com?  It’s not your site.  It’s run by some fucking eejit in the States called Mickey Suttle.  I can’t speak for my ‘cabal’ but my traffic is quite good thanks.  Tens of thousands of hits per day.

DailyAvgStats

Maybe your little friend in the States would like to contact me and I’ll teach him how to increase traffic?

everybody wants to be me. thats right go in to facebook and search for mickey suttle and you will get loads of imitators. now try the same with ‘headrambles’ or some other obscure member of you blogroll.

Oh, sweet lamb of divine Jayzus!  If I did do a search on the web for my name, I would get thousands of results.  But then I don’t search for my name, because I have a life.  And why would anyone want to be you?  Anyone can be a tosser.  All it takes is a right hand.

people are so jealous of me they post  misinformation, just like this:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/SuperShadow

Why in the name of all that’s holy should anyone be jealous of you?  The only people who have heard of you are the people that you and your little pals have annoyed.

but you know what grandad –jealousy is greatest form of flattery.

No. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.  Please get your facts right.  And while you are at it, could you please learn proper grammar and punctuation?  Or haven’t you come to that stage in school yet?

M E suttle (the magnificent, the great supershadow)

No.  You are not M E suttle [sic].  Mickey Suttle is a wanker in the States.  You are a wanker in Cork.  That is rather naughty of you to be using his name after you moaning about imitators.  And you should learn to be a little less modest.

Now, it’s quite a nice day, and you are on your school holidays, so I suggest you put on your Chewbacca suit and go out and play with your plastic Millennium Falcon, preferably on a main road.

The usual hasty conclusion

July 13th, 2010

There is a poll in today’s Irish Times where they pose the question “Do you think the State is doing enough to cut road deaths?”

I am delighted to see that [at the time of writing] that the majority are saying “Yes”.

It’s about time that the Irish realised that legislation is NOT the answer, and that it is really none of the State’s fucking business.

Of course this is all in response to that terrible accident on Sunday night where eight people were killed.

That accident was not one that could have been prevented with legislation.  I would hazard a guess that it was caused by one simple thing – testosterone.

Let’s look at the facts.

Car A is a Volkswagon Passat, a car designed for five passengers.  In fact it contained eight young men ranging in age from 19 to 23.

Car B is a Renault Mégane driven by a woman.

Car C is a Toyota Corolla driven by a 66 year old man.

Car A collided with Car B before smashing into Car C.  Conclusion?  Car A is at fault.

The fact that Car A contained eight young adults when it was designed for five, speaks volumes.  There were eight young lads who were apparently going home after watching the World Cup final.  Conclusion?  Whether there was drink involved or not, these lads were fired up and driving a fairly powerful car and doing what young lads always do – messing.

Of course I can pretty much guarantee that the cause of the accident will go down as ‘speed’, and Gay Byrne will be running a new fucking campaign urging us all to slow down.  One of these years the Road Safety Authority will get it into their thick fucking skulls that speed does not kill.  Bad driving kills.  Messing behind the wheel kills.  Not taking account of road condition kills.  Reckless driving kills.  Speed in itself doesn’t do anything except give the Nanny State a chance to clean out our wallets.

I have a good mind to get in a double-decker bus and run Gay Byrne over at ten miles an hour.

That should prove my point.

Where I have been going wrong

July 12th, 2010

For some time now, a caring reader has been sending me private emails.

I know he only has my best interests at heart, and I am flattered that he took such a lot of time out of his busy day to write to me.

I received a mail yesterday, in which he pointed out all my errors and the fact that I am quite obviously on the wrong path.  My problem is that I don’t quite know how to respond.  My English isn’t quite as eloquent as his, and I would like to reply to him and apologise for the error of my ways.

Maybe you can help?

Can you help me compose a reply?

His email [unedited] -

hello grandad

it has been some time. first let me get this out of the way.

i apologise for what could have been regarded as comment spamming on yours and various blogs last yr. but i dont apoligise for my reasons. mcGregor treachery will be avenged in this life our the next.

the other thing is i still notice your blog is full of anti-establishment ranting.your governent, your green party minister and duncan stewert are true heroes to many of us who  wish to talkle global warming, passive smoking and sustainable energy-all great ideals of many in the jedi religion(which is growing day by day)

the other day i was stopped by a police  officer for doing 35 kph in a 30kph zone.

what did i do? did i complain? no i got out and shook the officers hand and thanked him for saving my life.

i truly believe your lashing out of authority is the result of immaturity and a prolonged mid life crisis.  this could be cured but maybe in your  case its terminal.

either way you can change. you could drive in to town and simply go up and shake a parking attendants hand and tell them what a great job they are doing. you could warn young people of the dangers of smoking and become more civilly responsible.

may the  force be with you

Taking care of their own

July 10th, 2010

Every time I switch on Sharon The News these days, it’s the same story nearly every day.

Yet another body has been found with gunshot or stab wounds.

In virtually every singe case, a Garda stares sombrely into the camera and states that this is a suspected gangland killing and that the Gardai are appealing for witnesses and are pursuing the case with a vigour.

Why?

If these low life want to go around murdering each other then that’s fine by me.  Provided they don’t start murdering anyone else, then what’s the problem? 

What’s more, if the Gardai come on the news and have a good laugh at their job being done for them, then the gangland yobs might get the idea that they are open targets, and it might make ‘em think twice about their lifestyle?

Just a thought.

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