Smoking a strimmer can damage your health

August 15th, 2010

I decided to do some strimming yesterday.

The old estate is getting a little out of hand and the only way to tame it is a show of brute force.  I do my gardening with slash-hooks, chain saws and strimmers.

My strimmer isn’t one of those pansy ones that plugs in.  No.  It is an honest-to-God power yoke with a two-stroke engine.  I think I may have overdone the oil to petrol mix a tad as it can be quite smoky.  It was a calm day, so when I fired up the strimmer, I disappeared in a cloud of blue smoke which enveloped me for the hour or so I was out there.

For hours after I finished, I could taste the burnt oil.  I realised at that point that not only had I been breathing burning oil for an hour or so, but I must have indulged in a massive dose of carbon monoxide, not to mention a lethal dose of other toxins, poisons and carcinogens.  I would hazard a guess that an hour of that cocktail would be equivalent to smoking around a thousand cigarettes?

So where is the health warning?  Where is ASH when you need ‘em?  Why isn’t the State looking after my health?

“Strimming can cause a painful death”

“Strimming can lower your sperm count”

“Want to quit strimming?  Contact your doctor or pharmacist”

The Nanny State are missing out on a nice little niche market here.  I don’t know how they missed it.

Strimming may not be addictive [unless you are a very strange person], but it is highly contagious.  I have noticed in the past that whenever I start, I am the one to shatter the peace and quiet of the countryside.  By the time I have finished though, there are usually three or four strimmers, chainsaws or other two-strokes running in the neighbourhood.

The thing that concerns me most is that strimming may lead to harder drugs.

Like four-strokes?

5 Responses to “Smoking a strimmer can damage your health”

  1. Captain Haddock UNITED KINGDOMon 15 Aug 2010 at 6:08 pm

    I’m betting you’re really popular with your Male neighbours .. getting the “nagging machines” flashed up to the pitch of ..

    “….. and if that ould bollix can get off his arse to cut the grass, so can you” … ;)
     
    For the real hard-liners of mechanised gardening .. there’s always the ultimate of the “Ride-on mower”  … :) :)

  2. Grandad IRELANDon 15 Aug 2010 at 7:10 pm

    My male neighbours can sort out their own domestic affairs.  Nothing to do with me.  And I’m a hard-liner, am I?  I like my ‘ride-on’  :)

  3. BoruRYO UNITED KINGDOMon 15 Aug 2010 at 9:27 pm

    Bi Jasus mi auld Ranbler,did you not know,theres more
    fuming shit pumped out at Collinstown Airfield in one day
    than all the smoking paddiies have pumped out  since
    Chris Columbus got back from the Americas.

     

  4. Grandad IRELANDon 16 Aug 2010 at 12:51 am

    Well, ’tis a long time since I heard the name Collinstown Airfield!  Welcome BoruRYO.

  5. Captain Haddock UNITED KINGDOMon 16 Aug 2010 at 9:53 am

    “And I’m a hard-liner, am I? I like my ‘ride-on’ ” …..
     
    I should have known you’d have one really … ;) ;)

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