Archive for August, 2010

A clean post

August 2nd, 2010

There is nothing worse than a dirty computer.

In particular, I like to have a clean screen.

It is more than frustrating trying to clean a blemish out of an image, only to find that it’s not a blemish but a speck of dirt on the screen itself.

By the same token, I could slave for hours creating the perfect image but you don’t see it in all its glory.

Please….

Please….

Click here to clean your screens now.

Thanks.

Chilling the dinner plates

August 1st, 2010

I noticed a little headline in today’s paper.

“It’s now cool to hang crockery on the wall”

There are two things that irritate me about this.

The first is the use of that ubiquitous fucking word ‘cool’.  I hate that word on so many levels.  I despise it, not because it is American but rather the fact that it is overused to the extent that people no longer think about its meaning.  Cool is the opposite of warm.  Today is a cool day.  It now falls into the same category as ‘gay’ and ‘awesome’.  Of course the latter is the most teeth jarring of the lot and it appears everywhere, and anyone who uses it in my presence generally needs a visit to the dentist shortly after.

Assuming that the article referred to is not a handy hint on how to use your dinner plates as an air conditioning system, we come to my second point.

I haven’t read the article but I am prepared to bet my life that what it is trying to say is that it is now acceptable to hang plates on the wall?

Who the fuck decides on what is acceptable behaviour?

If I want to cover my walls with crockery, then that is my fucking business.

Are there really people out there who are going to heave a massive sigh of relief, now that their guilty secret has been blessed by The Nameless Ones who decide what is acceptable?  Are there idiots out there who will read this and promptly try to nail their dinner service to the wall?

Who the fuck are these Fashion Police? Who gives them their mandate?  Why do so many hang on their every word?

I just do not understand the modern world at all.

« Prev