Archive for November 5th, 2010

A man or a mouse

November 5th, 2010

There are times when I wonder if the whole world has gone mad.

I was browsing the headlines today.  It was the usual shite about the Gubmint about to rape us with their fucking budget, and the threat of major flooding throughout the country.  In other words, SNAFU.

Then a wee item caught my attention.

Apparently if you are a needy person, the Gubmint is going to sort you out.  They are going to issue cheese.  Yes.  You read that right.  The fucking Gubmint is arranging to give fucking cheese to needy families!!!

Are you freezing in your home because you can’t afford fuel?  Never mind.  Have some cheese.

Are you sitting in total darkness because your electricity has been cut off?  There there.  Have some cheese.

Are you suicidal because you can see no hope for the future?  You’ll feel a lot better after nibbling on a chunk of Cheddar.

Now, I like my cheese.  Just so long as it is red Cheddar, and not too strong, I’m happy.  Not everyone has the same taste however, and many prefer a different variety.  Herself for example likes goat’s cheese, which is why I’m thinking of buying a goat to live in the shed with her.  She wouldn’t thank you for a lump of Cheddar.  But the Gubmint aren’t accounting for tastes in this exercise – you take your Cheddar or you die.

Now if they handed out vouchers for electricity, or bags of fuel then I would say fair play.  Everyone can use a drop of electricity or a nice smoky bag of coal.  But cheese?

I suppose some will say that a lump of red is better than a kick in the arse, but it’s a close call if you ask me. 

I have a feeling that come next Spring, there are going to be a hell of a lot of happy mice around the country?