Archive for the 'Blogging' Category

My password isn’t password

January 21st, 2012

Dear Hackers,

A lot of you seem to be very keen to log into this site so you can write your own stuff.

Some of you try several times until you get locked out.  You wait until the lockout expires and then you try several more times.  Some of you have tried so many times that I think you may have an obsessional complex.  Yes.  I keep track of these things.

I could make life a little easier for you by telling you that I don’t log into this site using “admin” or “Grandad”, as I have deleted those accounts but why should I make life easier for you?

I could tell you that my password isn’t “password”, “Gandalf”, “Sandy” or “admin” but again, you’re on your own.

What I can tell you is that my password is a bitch to remember.  In fact I keep forgetting it, and if it wasn’t written on a certain part of my anatomy, nothing would ever get done here.

So if you are really that desperate to write stuff on the Interweb, I would suggest that you start your own site and fuck off out of mine.

Yours etc,

Grandad

The End

December 31st, 2011

Right.

That’s it.

I have had enough of this ‘blogging’ nonsense.

I’m quitting.

I am not going to write another post for the rest of the year.

I may start again next year.

If I feel like it.

Old dogs and new tricks

November 27th, 2011

I see myself as a fairly ordinary bloke.

I muddle along through life, doing the best I can and occasionally jotting my thoughts down here.  I don’t see anything extraordinary in that?

But then I come across something like this –

GET YOUR FOLKS ONLINE

Are your folks missing out because they’re not online?
Have you ever tried to help?
We know how difficult it can be!

Aha!  So that’s where I have been going wrong?  It explains one hell of a lot.  I shouldn’t be messing around here on the Interweb at all.  I have to wait until the daughter shows me how.

I will look forward to that.

So apparently she is going to teach me about “Using the mouse”?  That’s wrong for a start.  I don’t want to use the little fucker – I just want to kill it.  It has been shitting all over the place and resolutely ignoring all the traps.

Then there is “Sending an email”.  Again, that’s wrong.  I want to know how to send thousands of emails with one press of a key.  Those Viagra won’t sell themselves.

And “Shopping online”?   No, no, no!  That won’t do.  I need a course on “Stopping shopping online”.  Maybe then I could teach it to Herself.  Badly needed.  Just ask the poor postman.

Delving onto the site, I found a links page with all the links that any old fart would need.  There is a section there called “Blogs written by Older People”.  That’ll be interesting, I thought.  And what do I find in there?  Me.  Me and Grannymar.  The only two they could find?  And we are not even related?  Fuck!

So I am being held up as a beacon of light to the Old Folk of Ireland?  If that old fart can do it, then anyone can?  Hah!

In the meantime, I had better let the daughter know about this site so she can start teaching me.

Now, if only I knew how to use email………………

Where nothing happens

November 17th, 2011

Well, I must say I enjoyed my day off.

I must do it more often.

Maybe take an extra day off every week?  Or a couple of days?  Or seven days?

One of the problems I have is that nothing much happens here from one day to the next.  I therefore have little local news to regale you with.  I could write repeated and endless descriptions of Pullit pulling pints, but that would be monotonous.  I could amuse you all with Spanner’s futile attempts to get his leg over the yang wan in the grocery shop, but he would never forgive me, and I value his friendship. 

Life in the Manor isn’t much better, so that leaves me with very few subjects.  The only three that really get me worked up are the smoking bans, the EU and our useless fucking gubmint.  The problem here is that you are tired of hearing about them.  It has reached the stage where even oblique references brings forth moans from certain quarters.

I could invent stuff but that would be hard work and anyway I have always followed a policy of telling the truth, so that’s out.

It’s pissing down like incontinent elephants at the moment so I doubt I’ll get out and about today.  It’s also blowing half a gale so all in all, it ain’t very pretty out there.

So once again, I’ll probably have nothing to write about tomorrow.

No change there then.

Rules and Regulations

November 6th, 2011

I don’t know how people would label my political philosophy?

Right Wing?  Left Wing?  Conservative?  Liberal?

Personally I don’t give a shit about labels but if I had to give myself one, I would like to think of myself as as Aspiring Libertarian.  And what is that, you may ask?  Essentially I believe in personal liberty.  People should be free to make their own mistakes.  The only law that should exist should be there to protect people from the action of others, and any law that doesn’t fulfil that basic requirement is a bad law.  Government dictats that tell me what I can eat, drink, smoke, where I can park my car or any other action that doesn’t affect others is a bad law.  The goal of an intelligent mature society should be to have a few laws as possible and not to have life so wrapped up in petty laws, rules and regulations as to make it virtually impossible to live without breaking some fucking rule or other.

I would like to think that I use my philosophy in the running of this site.  I try to have as few rules as possible.  There are some things though that I will not tolerate here.

I will not tolerate anything that could be deemed to be libellous.

I will not stand for racial or religious intolerance.

A bit of banter is fine but serious abuse of commentators is not allowed.

The most important rule though is that I have the final say in what is acceptable or not.  I reserve the right to alter or delete comments I deem to be offensive.  I reserve the right to bar people from commenting altogether.  I reserve the right not to give any explanation for my actions.

So there you are.  Essentially just four rules.  A Libertarian site?

Of course there is another rule…..

It’s my site and I can do what I fucking like with it.

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